Bruiser had a dirty moustache

So on the way to the bar Friday night we're in my friend's car, haven't started drinking yet and in the car next to us is this guy, looking over at me in the back seat (for story's sake, we'll name him Bruiser) and he's looking angry blah like he's drunk and has done 90 different kinds of drugs. Exactly 90. So he spits out his window towards our car and I start laughing at him because he looks funny. Then he stares at me like he's going to kill me and I ignore him for a bit. Down the road a bit more, their car is still beside us and the dude's starin' me down still! I look over again and give him a goofy smile and wave. At this point he spits at our car again and starts cussin' at us. I laugh my ass off and tell my friend to lock the car door. I'm not drunk yet, I don't feel like getting in a fight right now. I'm not a fighter. More of a peacemaker. My catchphrase when fights used to come up was to go up between the guys and say, "whoa whoa whoa, calm the fuck down, now shake hands or i'll fucking kill you," i'd say in a very calm, drunken sort of way and it always worked.

Gladly I didn't have to tell Bruiser that I didn't want to fight. I just ended up laughing my head off at this drunk, 90 drug induced native guy with a moustache who seemed to think opening his car door and attempt to get over to our car while both cars were in motion was a good idea. Silly guy. With my luck, he'll be at the bar tonight and i'll have to deal with him. If it is to happen though, i'll be sure to have some crazy story and moniker to make things interesting.